Second hand

I have been feeling extremely tenacious lately. Thought about small businesses and making ends meet by creating an online business worthy for those who, just like me, cannot make due with minimum wage.
I’m no bourgeois bitch. But I suppose being young has left me for the taste for the extravagant and for the new.
I would never ever buy second hand clothing because I feel they have some years on them and they don’t exactly belong to me, but I do believe that either selling your clothes you don’t wear or giving them to charity if they have a few years on them is a great idea!
So I googled “cash for clothes” for three days straight. I came up with nothing

I went onto Facebook and going two groups called “Second Hand” where people could post pictures of their items and if anyone was interested, they would be able to create a meet and have their items sold.
Except, I didn’t get any offers….
So what I have been thinking about is starting an online store where you could actually get Cash For Clothes.
It would be for less than you bought it, obviously and I would need some assistance in managing the clothing. I would donate many to charity. Have them handed out to those who actually do need them.


The only dilemma I do have about this sort of idea is that I don’t have money to pay for anyone else’s used goods. Which is quite the predicament.
What I am getting at, people, is that as a twenty one year old girl who always reads about how becoming an entrepreneur is in demand in this generation, I realized that there will always be setbacks.

There are always obstacles.

Young people should be able to start their own clothing lines. Their own garages to fix cars. Their own dog walking companies without the worry of not having the money to sustain their daily lives.
Its a big thing to think about and I think companies should start investing in some of these ideas. After all, that’s how they started out, isn’t it?

But what do I know?
I’m just twenty one year with a dream.


Table mountain’s birthday


Table mountain’s birthday special was beautiful. Despite the wind, the mist and the clouds covering the view of the city, this was possibly one of the best days of my life. I love the city vibe, don’t get me wrong. But once you see something as profound and as spectacular as this, you can’t exactly go back.


I don’t understand the term “bad bitch”
Even if I ever did consider myself a “bitch”, I couldn’t possibly want to be a bad one.

Debating my morals

Whenever I go online to check for student loans to pay for my studies, I get some bullshit motivational passage saying that they will help us with our study fees and pay for our futures.
Yet once you apply and go through an entire process of answering questions and filling in your personal details (I’ve done this a thousand times), all you get is a sad message saying “Unfortunately you do not qualify”

Dear God, please tell me why the ones who are adamant on finishing their degrees are the ones struggling to pay for it, when there are many people who do receive bursaries and loans who do nothing but squander it away.

I’m not being insensitive and maybe they do have intentions to complete their studies but I wish institutions and banks could have some sort of machine enabling them to sort out the students who have the drive from the students who just want something to do.



The worst

I hate the weight jokes. I hate them to the depths of my soul. They make me physically pain. It doesn’t matter wjo its coming from. I feel a sudden sense of not being enough. Or being too much.
A failure at being healthy.

And the worst part is, I’m not even that fat. I’m not fat at all. For my height and age, I am perfectly normal. I am more than capable of getting through the day physically.
I just have to watch what I eat. I am not blessed with a fast metabolism, or some supernatural genes that let you eat what you want.

But the weight jokes. Fuck, they get me bad. They make me hate myself after weeks and weeks of dieting. One comment will make me skip meals, regret that snack I just had or even worse, cry in front of everyone for no reason.

Friendship fails

I have always wondered why my friend group diminished as I went through different phases.
At first I thought it had something to do with falling apart, growing up and choosing different scenarios to play out; to each their own.

Today I have come to realize that it’s not because people grow apart but it’s because I’ve noticed things about certain people I hadn’t been paying attention to before. Things I hated.
One of those were the fact that most of the people I once called friends had a tendency to bash me when we were in a group of friends.
When it came to speaking about weight or fitness, they mocked my body and said things like “you would never be able to hike up there.” And I would laugh along, silently cursing them.
They would underestimate me constantly. Saying that I’m nowhere near that peak in life or I’m not as smart enough to do that. At first I thought it was brutal honesty, but when I eventually did hike up that hill…. When I eventually did reach that peak of intelligence, I refused to tell them. Why? Because I felt as though they won’t be as appreciative of my success as I am.

I wouldn’t call it jealousy.
But I wouldn’t call it friendship either.

New age problems

I’m stuck between becoming a brand;
I am fully equipped to use any social media platform.
I am unhealthily obsessed with the Kardashians.
Any other woman making it big because of their beauty and their means to make money, actually.
I am economical.
I know how to persuade, assert and compete.
New trends are always intriguing to me.
I have been blessed with breasts big enough to cast a shadow over my stomach, a butt you can use as a pillow and I’m tall enough to intimidate other women.

But I’m really much different.
I’m quiet
Im constantly reading.
My brain is either doing crosswords, making something creative, and writing short stories and essays for no reason
I cry when I write sometimes.
I want to make women cry because they relate to my stories
I want women to see me as a role model because of my brain

I won’t say I’m supernaturally beautiful but I’m not what one would expect
And I’m constantly thinking about whether or not this will be the cross roads in my life.

Literature lover

I get books out of the library every second week. I might have read most of the teenage section in Belville Library, Cape Town.
The most common theme are distopias (which I love) and I always fall in love with a series.
As a confession, I must admit I am immediately attracted to strong female characters such as Gemma in Tidal.
They’re inspirational in the sense that they are their own saviors despite help they get from others. They fight despite their circumstances.

In another sense, female villians are just as appealing. Having that sort of power, despite bad, has a great effect on young women who feel powerless in reality.
On my umpteenth set of books with powerful women making moves in their fictional worlds.
Whether witches or bitches, women have it in them to take over the world. You just need to let it out.



My brand new therapy technique. Adult coloring book from Bargain Books. People think its infantalizing but its actually pretty calming. Considering my anxiety is physically showing (hair loss) I am always looking for different ways to “zen” out or whatever the hell its called.
This is my favorite.
P.S. I am queen of coloring!