Fabricated

I have some issues with organized religion.
“Some issues” might not be the right phrasing either.
I have always had a problem with being forced to wake up early on the only day I get to sleep in, dress prissy and go to church with my mother. She was going through a phase and thought that maybe joining a church was the answer. Unlike her new frame of mind, her children were not as reluctant.
We fought constantly with me not wanting to go. I didn’t like the fact that I didn’t want to but had to pretend that I am like everyone else in that church.
I can sing along. But why?
I can throw money into the concession bin. But why?
I can greet and praise God loud enough for everyone to hear me. To cheer me on. But it won’t be for the right reasons.

No. I don’t believe in organized religion and it took me quite a while to admit that to myself. But after being abused by my boyfriend (which is another story all on its own)… And then being forced to go to church with him because his father would kick him out otherwise, that kind of pushed the truth out of me.

This life, its not for me. I believe in God but I don’t need to get confirmed.
I can thank him for what he has given him, but I dont have to give my money to the church.
I can be a good person by giving to others and doing things that they genuinely need to do for them, but I don’t need to shout his name in order for everyone to know I am a good person.

I would like the facade to fall and maybe someday it will. A higher power seems real but I honestly think the bible was just a good book taken way too far.

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