Woman. RISE. 

Happy woman’s day to all powerful woman in the world. 

To those who have proved to be greater than expected and more powerful than the men who have told them to stand down. 

To the girls who loved books more than barbies and couldn’t understand why her brother got to eat and sleep whereas she had to clean up after them all

To those who do not keep quiet in a world where rape is as common as dying.

Woman. Rise above the remarks made by those we need to support us on what we can do and what we are no supposed to.

Rise out of the ashes of your burnt dreams, phoenix. You’re not dead. So what is stopping you from fighting back?Nothing should be able to hold you back anymore! 

Stand for your womanhood and the people who support you.  Shake hands with the women who hate us for our strength. Wish them their own happiness if they try and steal yours. You are more powerful than you know. And that is why you should rise.

By the words of Maya Angelou, we have been written down in history as weak. Fragile. Dependent. Those were all “twisted lies” because we’ve overcome generations of feeling inferior. To the point that our grandparents believe us to be spoiled. “Too smart” they tell us.  But that is what they are used to. 

But we will rise. 

Rise above Paulette Julies’ poem about the role of women. Why should we be in the kitchen instead of out in the field. Why should I have to fight to prove to be the one fit for the job.

I call bullshit! To all those telling us we are not intelligent enough to take on roles previously seen as “male”. Have we not come far enough to show otherwise? 
I am not a victim.

I am not a child 

I am as human as you and as powerful as it gets. You can throw me down and you can yell at me. But I will rise out of the hatred you have woven around us for centuries… 

As a woman, I will rise. And I will fuck you up. 

As it were.

Everyone should have their own guilty pleasures. Some like the fact that wine makes their problems disappear. Others like pills (no judgment, I like pills too). Some people listen to really corny music and love (Taylor Swift, anyone?) and others, well, they eat. I guess I am a bit different.

I wouldn’t go ahead and say that I am unique in having a different pleasure. A lot of people do, but maybe they are not as confident to say it. I know a few people, my brother included, who tends to draw ad redraw the world map without noticing. He doodles Geography! And that is an example of how the simple pleasures we enjoy either go unnoticed or we blatantly ignore that we do them. Why is that though? Are you ashamed of the word “weird”?  I don’t think we ought to be ashamed of the things that make us happy. For example, my guilty pleasure:

I took a drive out to Oudtshoorn, Western Cape, the other way during the festive holidays. I went along with my boyfriend and his family and we took a 5 hour road trip. 5 hours….

Anyway, despite the different stops we took, my favorite was when we popped into Knysna. I don’t know if any of you know this but its called the Garden Route. And well so. Most of the town is covered in trees whether it be planted or natural. Large rows of trees tower over the roads of Knysna making the hues stand out better than any camera quality you could imagine. The colors of the green trees contrasted the tar roads and the dark brown trunks. But the sky…the sky lit it all up.

Halfway through back to Oudtshoorn, I noticed I had been smiling the whole time. My neck was sore from staring out of the window the whole time and I had been thinking deeply. I think about everything when I see something that beautiful. I am a born and Bred City girl but that doesn’t mean I haven’t ever seen great forests and fields. But nothing like Knysna.

The fact that I am hypnotized by God’s own sculptures. I could stare at a tree for hours and wonder how this living breathing beauty can outlive even the greatest of humans. I wonder how it would look in the next 100 years and if it will still be the Garden Route.

I wonder how we, as humans, can allow our ignorance and our narcissism to overlook the superpower that is human nature.

If only I were put in a different time. If only I were alive to see nature of what it was before us. Freestanding. Powerful, I bet.

That is my guilty pleasure.

Admiring.

 

 

 

Stuck in the middle

I have a kept a grudge on this subject for a long time. Being a colored girl in South Africa is not always easy….
We’re in the middle, us colored people, and we have these funny stereotypes stuck onto us at all times.
I’m okay with being the funny stereotype, but its the unfair privilege everyone else gets that upsets me

See, since I was finishing up high school, I was set on studying further. there was no other option for me, I was a student. A constant learner. I needed to feed my mind and to me the only way to get out of this life was to surpass everyone else mentally. And hopefully financially.
I worked hard, for two years, I stayed broke. Living off of my poor mother who had to take out loan after loan to pay for my first year. We lost our house and we were renting out this tiny one. Everything was okay for a year….

But then it all went down. When I applied to study for my third year, I was told I owe money for my second year so I couldn’t register till I paid 25000….ALL THIS IN JANUARY! 
I applied for loans, and I got no answer. Not even a decline. They told me that my mother doesn’t qualify,and then they “lost” my application.
I tried NSFAS and they wanted a divorce decree from my parents who barely even speak. That was a bit much for me

I tried the banks, but seeing as I couldn’t get my marks I couldn’t apply for a student loan from the bank (standard bank generally asks for a copy of your marks. And you only get your marks once you pay for your studies)

I don’t understand. I didnt.
I thought that it would have been easy, you know, for some one who wants to study to be able to. But I am not well off, credit is not in my parents favor and why am I suffering if they made a few mistakes in their life. My credit record is rising, yes but not nearly enough for what I need. I’m only 21 and I’m disadvantaged more than the previously oppressed race is at this moment. I get that they suffered… But they aren’t the only ones.

Its not even about race anymore. Its about passion. Its about consistency . its about hard work

I feel like if you are determined to finish, why should you not be able to get financial assistance. Why is it so hard to even go back to finish your studies?
As the self proclaimed middle child of the races in south Africa, coloreds are usually overlooked until we act up.
I’m just lost and confused as to what they are actually asking of me. Protesting is a waste of time. Saving up takes to long. What we generally need is to have a secure set of financial security institutions that will help students who cannot depend on their parents salaries.
For students like me, who would like nothing else but to go back to class and learn new things
Which is actually all I want.